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Mother’s Day is a lovely celebration but we know it can also cause a tidal wave of grief for those who have lost their own mother figure, or for mums who have lost a baby or child.

The run-up to Mother’s Day, and the day itself, can be tough when many others will be celebrating.

This year may be especially challenging. During the pandemic, we know that bereavement is particularly difficult, whether this death resulted from the COVID-19 virus or not.

You may not have been able to be with your dying relative, or given them the funeral and farewell that you would have liked to.

Our bereavement counsellors are sharing advice and guidance on how you and your loved ones can cope with the loss of a mum, or a child:

 

Acknowledge the day and its impact on you

  • It is likely to be a more challenging day than normal. Some people may want to be on their own, being quiet and reflective.  Others may want company and to share memories. It’s really important to simply do what feels right for you.

Be kind to yourself

  • Give yourself permission to put yourself first. Do something that you enjoy and remember it is ok to feel happy.  That could mean getting outside to garden, walk, or cycle.   Alternatively, you may prefer to stay in listening to music, reading or having a nice meal and a hot bath.

Remember the person who has died

  • There are many ways to remember your loved one. You could light a candle or plant something in the garden. You could write your feelings down in a Mother’s Day card or do something you used to enjoy doing together.
  • If the pandemic makes this difficult, then online tributes can be a helpful way of reflecting on how much your loved one meant to you. Perhaps post a Facebook message, a photo on Instagram, or share a video with family and friends.

For children, the same guidance can apply but you can also involve them in discussions about any plans for the day. Allow them to have different views and needs from you and from their siblings.

Do you need further bereavement support?

At Treetops, we appreciate that each person grieves differently.  Our trained counsellors continue to support children, young people and adults impacted by bereavement.

We have put COVID measures in place so we can continue to offer face to face counselling, or if preferred, support via telephone or video calls.

If you, or a loved one, would like to speak in confidence to one of counsellors, please call us on 0115 949 6944